The Blog with the Bone to Pick

I have a Bone to Pick. I have a complaint. Now in the normal scheme of things I would dash to my email program and shoot off a missive of abuse to whomever had inspired my wrath.

God or Mother Nature or that Higher Being I do not believe, although I could be mistaken, have email addresses. Nor are they on skype. No mobile phone number. No home phone number. No fax machine. No PO Box address. I mean in this day and age? Really!

I want to talk to the person in charge of the production line they day they made me. Sombody has a real warped sense of humour and is right at this minute kicking back laughing their arse off at me. I want to know the following things:-

WHY bestow upon a being a love of the outdoors and gardening - and throw in spring/summer/autumn allergies?????

WHY bestow upon a being a love of the beach and the sun (and indeed plonk that person in Australia 5 minutes from the beach) and make her a red head with freckles and pale skin?

WHY bestow upon a being the love of parties, booze, dancing, booze, partying, alcohol, raging, dancing, wine, dancing bare foot, scotch, beer, dancing barefoot until 4 in the morning, cocktails, dancing barefoot until 4 in the morning whilst holding beer and not spilling any, wearing a flouncy skirt and dancing barefoot until 4 in the morning thinking one can legimately dance latin style whilst flicking around flouncy skirt and holding beer and THEN make her suffer for 4 days?

OK so mother nature probably was NOT responsible for that last one - but I figure while I am complaining I might as well just throw that one in.

So if ANYBODY has a address, contact number etc etc where I can forward my complaint - please advise me of same.

K