The Blog with the co-habitating.....

Co-habitate.

Definition: to live together, though not married; cohabit

That online dictionary does not mince words.

I'm not sure if I have mentioned Mr. X before. I don't think I have. Actually I know that I haven't. I have alluded to something happening in my life. But never actually spelled it out. Let me set the scene.

About 6 years ago my marriage of 16 years, ended. Boy child and I set about making a life for ourselves in our new little home. There was an on-again/off-again "friend" who would take me out to dinner and places on the nights/days that Boy Child would spend with his father. Nothing drastic, just some company.

In January of 2010, when a long distance (read: internet) romance was slowly breaking my heart, in sauntered Mr. X from stage left.

We are polar opposites. He is fit and active and loves sports and exercise. My idea of exercise is to not take an afternoon nap. He is social and a conversationalist and passionate and rather um loud. I am quiet, shy in big groups, too lazy to actually be passionate about much. He is a fly by the seat of your pants, take everything as it comes, stresses about nothing kinda guy. I am an anally retentive, OCD sufferer who stresses about everything. He hoards treasures everything. EVERYTHING. I am a chucker. He constantly takes me out of my comfort zone. We clicked.

We dated. Boy child never having seen his mother with a "boyfriend", adapted. Time went by and everything just felt easy. Right. The months merged into each other and it felt like Mr. X and I had been together for an eternity.

We decided, with Boy Child's consultation and ultimate blessing, that Mr. X would "cohabit" with us. That was November 2010.

"Cohabiting" between two fully grown, independent adults is not as easy as I thought it would be........to be continued.

The Blog with the hot flush.....

Although it may just have been because it was warmish outside and I was cooking in the kitchen.

Although everybody else in the house was coolish or "comfortable".

Although at 42 I have been told that at any MOMENT crap like this could start.

A hot feeling invading your body bringing with it sweat from various pores on your body (I don't think I can actually use the term "hot flush") when combined with Mr. I'mNotReallyHardofHearingIActuallyLiketoHavetheTelevisionVolumeUpThisLoudJustCos channel surfing in the next room, actually pushes one over the edge of sanity. At the very least it pushed me to take sanctuary in the cool, dark, quiet space of my bedroom.

In my sanctuary I called upon all the feminine presences to sooth me and walk me through this next phase in my life. What no doubt will be another spiritual and mind enhancing experience, kinda like um I dunno say .... CHILDBIRTH.

Not on your farking life.

First thing Monday my doc gonna give me every available hormone known to man.

Menopause you can kiss my slightly overweight, cellulited, closer to the ground than ever before, arse.

The Blog with....a really urgent question....

I had a blog entry in my head. It was some twaddle about the little things in life which will ultimately get you. I should stop there. Today's trash blog is tomorrow's Blog treasure. However a question came to me. A question that probably I should have asked 10 years ago, 15 years ago, certainly 5 years ago when my marriage crashed and burned.

Can strong women make men less....manly????

Can strong women make men less....capable???

Ok that's two questions I know however both are within the same realm so tough.

Did I emasculate him so much that he was incapable of any adult, strong, manly action? Did I do that unconsciously therefore consciously having to step up and be the adult, capable person in the relationship???? Do strong women have to SCREAM that we TOO need support and help and loving in our relationships? Or do we have to totter around in 6 inch heels (OK I do this too - please I am after the sterotype) mubling incoherently about some mechanical contraption that failed us (the dishwasher) whilst pouting our.....lips (ok boobs can help here) and wait for some knight in shining armour???

I have NO clue whether this makes ANY sense or not - this is the first time that writing a blog my fingers have worked faster that my brain. This is not a well thought out, well paraphased piece of writing. This is really from the heart.

Was it my fault??

The Blog with too much contentment......

Is it possible to be too happy? Too content? Too, I can't remove my head from the freaking clouds even if I tried??

The last few months have seen things fall into place in my life in an almost alarming way. It feels TOO right. TOO easy. TOO un-fought for.

I am always suspicious of something that is un-fought for. Given I feel that anything worth having is worth putting in the effort for, I have I believe, fought and struggled for all that is good in my life.

Have I just lucked into a few things that are just going to fall into place for me? Is this the end result of the struggling up to this point? Or is it all going to come crashing down on my head in one last soul crushing act?

Time, I would assume, will tell. In the meantime - if you need me - I'm the one floating around the damn clouds with a grin plastered on my face from ear to ear.

The Blog with the Syncing....

Recently there was a discussion in the office regarding how to better keep track of people when they are out and about.

This then lead to a discussion of what we, as inhabitants of this fast moving and technologically changing World, use in our everyday lives.

I have a black leather bound filofax-esque diary that contains my whole life. This diary and I have been together now for approximately 10 years and it will need to be removed from the clutches of my cold, dead hands for me to ever give it up.

I did not share this information.

Our part-time Administrative Assistant then announced that she uses Microsoft Outlook calendar which she then syncs with her Google calendar and then uploads to her blackberry. She can then - at any given time and place - determine where she is, where she should be and where she is going in the future. Her husband can also log on (because she "shares" her calendar duh) to track the whereabouts and goings-on of his wife. He also "shares" his calendar so they both know exactly where each other is at any moment of the day.

Now please do not get me wrong, I am not saying for one moment that I think this woman is not important enough or busy enough to utililse this kind of technology......but..... I don't believe this woman is important enough or busy enough to utililse this kind of technology.

I will admit to dabbling with technology as a means of communication. I have been guilty in the past of using messenger to stay connected with Boy Child. Even in the same house. I like to think though that that is his mother being hip and happening and sharing the world as he knows it.

BUT.....do I need a technological gadget to tell me where I should be? or where I went? or where I need to be? More importantly though - and really the point of this Blog if it has one at all - are we SO busy, SO stressed, SO important that technology has taken the place of face to face verbal discussions with our loved ones? I know for one - that if any member of my family had to track me down using a calendar I had uploaded to who-bloody-knows-where, I would be ashamed.

Am I just getting old and resisting change???????????

The Blog with the temptation.....

Very very soon, in Kansas City, Missouri (not Kansas City, Kansas but Kansas City, MISSOURI) a person will board a big red flying kangaroo and wing his way to Oz. To see me. ME.

I believe, given this is his first ever trip to Australia, he may also be interested in seeing um mmmm Aussie stuff...however he is also coming to see ME.

This makes me feel very special.

On two recent trips to the States I have been lucky enough to have a wonderful, special group of people who have opened their homes and their lives to me, while providing me with memories and tears and laughter that will never fade. For the first time I get to reciprocate.

There will be penguins to see, koalas to cuddle, Sydney Harbour Bridges to climb (wtf was I thinking?) and beaches and coastlines to admire.

However I am struggling with a temptation.

Now temptation and I have a very strange relationship. Basically I cannot resist it. Ever.

Do I provide Mr. Kansas City Missouri with a slice of traditional Aussie life??? Should I leave him bake on a beach in 40 degree heat while obtaining 3rd degree burns? Do I insist on him trying a kangaroo steak and an emu kabab?*** Do I find a red back spider under a toilet seat somewhere and when his arse is bitten see how long it takes him to dial OOO??? Do I obtain one of our ten deadly snakes and let it loose in the back yard?? Do I make him eat a Vegemite sandwich???? Do I leave him outside at dusk to get eaten and bitten alive by mozzies and various other stinging biting insects????

Temptation, temptation, temptation.


*** I believe we are the only country with the distinction of eating both animals that appear on it's Coat of Arms. Nice huh??

The Blog with the funeral.....

My Auntie passed away. My Mum's sister. 3 days before Mum had surgery. The funeral was 2 days after Mum came home from hospital. That was yesterday. It was sad.

And that is really all I can say about it......